Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Tigers, and Snow, and Albinos oh my!

Well, after a week and a half of some pretty crappy stomach pains it seems that maybe my no shit dilemma has resolved itself. I hate to say that prematurely, but the fact is that I certainly and not having any trouble with the old number 2 these days and my stomach is not hurting like it was. I still have no idea what the problem was and I don't care as long as I don't have to go through that again.

I don't think that I mentioned this before but I saw my first real live albino a few weeks ago while driving. It was like looking at a teenage version of Edgar Winter. I thought how much it would suck to be that much different from everyone else because albinism only occurs in about 1 out of every 3,000 people. I will say that Maine is a hell of a good place to live if you're an albino because the weather is so fucking shitty here so much of the time you won't have to worry that much about sun exposure.

It's supposed to snow tomorrow and to listen to the weather reports you'd think that no one in this state ever saw a flake of fucking snow. It happens every year and yet, we still hear about how bad and treacherous every storm is supposed to be. God, I wonder what the TV stations in Maine see for extra revenue during the winter months. The number must be pretty high because every time the skies cloud up all we hear about is 'storm watch' this and 'weather alert' that. I think the grocery stores and gas stations are in pretty tight with the TV stations and it wouldn't surprise me one bit if there is a fair amount of kick back going on. Anyway, run out to the store and stock up on bread because this whopping 5-7 inches we're supposed to get might just incapacitate everyone until mud season.

I just saw Cindy Blodgett during the sports segment of the news and all I can say is, "Holy spike-dyke Batman." A spiky blond lesbian cut on a face that isn't all that attractive to begin with is just not a good look. Cindy Blodgett has never been a pretty girl to begin with but now she just looks like a bull dyke in search of a lipstick lesbian china closet to thrash around in. What a hot ass mess.

Does anyone actually give a fuck about Tiger Woods and the mess he's gotten himself into? I know I sure as hell don't. In fact I find myself laughing when I think about the time that some of the media outlets are devoting to such a fucking non-story. Helloooooooo, the economy is in shambles, the president associates with known communists, and soldiers are dying overseas and here we are worrying about Tiger Woods and what gold diggers he's sticking his cock into? Really? We're in trouble folks when shit like this even makes the news considering what else is going on that could and should be talked about. Oh well, at least Tiger takes the spotlight off Obama and his follies for a little bit.

If you like the old children's classic Christmas special, 'Rudolph, the Red-Nosed Reindeer', then please let me recommend another great show to you. It is called, 'Rudolph, the Five-Legged Reindeer' and it is destined to be a classic as well. Here is the link: (Oh, I should mention that this is slight adult content and not for the kiddies. Be forewarned.)

http://www.break.com/usercontent/2007/5/Rudolph-The-Five-Legged-Reindeer-298455.html

Until next time, enjoy this video and Merry Christmas Mother Fuckers!

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